Tuesday, January 31, 2012

No Excuses, Just Life

There is something to be said for the falling silence of winter. It can quiet the thoughts that rage out of control in the seasons of activity. Yet, to the active mind that wishes to continue to rage its voice is swallowed up in bitter ice chilling cold. It angers the thrashing mind more than calming it.

I realize that when I started this blog I was under the activity of the former mind. I was trying to express ideas around an edge of a fishing hole. Of course, I feared that there would be a crack that would swallow me up and take me under, but I always circumnavigated the edge of ideas, memories and dreams. I was safe, or so I thought. Yet, when you open up a hole on a frozen lake things may try to creep up; the very things you hate to face like: a two headed mutated bass or a stinging catfish. Whatever it was that bobbed upwards, the fear was going down with it to the depths and never finding your way back to the hole, and freedom.

Life is like this, interesting and dangerous.

Life is: a deer rifle pointed at you by cocky Junior who has anger issues and who is both drunk and high.

Life is a series of strangers who wish to do you harm; strangers that you think are four but, are only two wearing wigs and trying to kidnap you.

Life is a pervert calling on the phone and saying inappropriate things you cannot understand because you are only 6. He tries to get your address but the saintly lawnmower is driven by an angel mother to drown out any other sound.

Life is a crazy person in a mask jumping out from the forest of sled hill to abduct the first child coming across the path. I was the second.

Life is not knowing you were close to death except the fear on your friends faces when they swear they weren't sure you were breathing.

Life is men with perverted intentions.

This could be all there is to write. The graphic and frightening demons of life but, what remains is hope and redemption. Life is grace. Everyday the sun shines is a day you are not pulled under with the enormous jealous darkness because, darkness cannot understand light. And from light the darkness must flee.

Life is this great and wondrous thing which I embrace. It is jumping off a 15 foot cliff at Tailor Falls into a red river and coming out alive again.